I watched Gloria Steinem talk about the women’s movement on Oprah’s Next Chapter, where she discussed the progress we have and have not made since the 1960s. Listening to Gloria reminded me of being a kid back in 1969. At family events, my mother's friends and relatives would ask, “Robin, what do you want to be when you grow up?”
I boldly and confidently replied, "I wanna be a women's libber!"
Of course, my proud announcement would often shock my older French relatives. I have no doubt they whispered to my mother, “This one’s going to be trouble.”
I have no idea how I knew what a women's libber was at age five. My mother was a traditional stay-at-home and certainly wasn't burning bras at City Hall. Perhaps it was the nightly news, although I don't remember any specific story that influenced me. In retrospect, I wonder if I came into this life pre-programmed to move the cause forward for women to freely pursue their chosen life path by holding that
space for myself.
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I’m the poster child for the women’s liberation movement. I’m a professional woman who has worked for large accounting firms and public companies in what has been traditionally a man’s role. I’m single and happily kid free. I own a home or three. I contribute and do my civic duty by volunteering on the local zoning board (traditionally a position held by men), and I speak freely about the issues that are important to me and the people in my community (with absolutely no regrets!). I love the freedom to walk on the beach when I want, and I ask for no one’s approval or opinion about what I do in my life. Has it been easy being a Women’s Libber? No way. Ask my friend Chad. He and I got into a discussion about this. He thinks women can easily slide into success without much issue these days. I told him that his eyes will never see what my eyes have seen. Older senior managers in public companies and large accounting firms still choose the young males as their protégés to mentor and give plumb assignments to while women are still pushed into non-profit work. The older guys want someone to discuss football and baseball games with over lunch. They want to be able to ask a protégé to lunch without feeling someone might think it’s a pick up. They want someone to travel, play golf or go out for a beer with after work. Younger women are just too messy for them to mentor.
I recently asked several professional women I know if they had a mentor. They laughed at me (no kidding). They all admitted they were on their own. They said they worked hard for what they achieved with no leg up from any mentor. This obviously needs to change.
Although my friend Chad is well meaning and hopeful, he and many other men might not have the radar for the subtle ways women are excluded from great opportunities to rise in their profession. I have many stories tucked away in the rafters of my mind, including one where young female interns at the accounting firm I worked for came up to me and asked, “Robin, why do the male interns get the good assignments like the Dallas Cowboys or the large oil and gas companies, and they put us on the non-profit jobs or small company jobs?”
It broke my heart hearing their very astute observations. It meant that a whole generation of young women behind me were already being discouraged, and they hadn’t even gotten their foot in the door yet. It made me question if my generation had failed to move things forward enough for the women behind us like Gloria Steinem did for me and Susan B Anthony did for her.
Is it hopeless? No way. There are some spit fire women who are able to break the barriers. To be quite honest though, they’re not all that pleasant to work with. They seem stressed and at times extremely controlling. Their male counterparts seem more easy going even under pressure. Perhaps it’s part of the learning curve for women in leadership roles to be worked through over the next decade. We’ll learn that one failure or mistake does not mean we’re immediately put out to pasture, and the men who manage us will allow us to take risks and fall on occasion without thinking they were crazy to hire us…a woman for a man’s job.
I recently worked with a female VP of Finance for a software company (also a single mother) where she went off on her finance team and announced in a meeting, that if they didn’t get the project done within the next 30 days, her “ass would be on the line and wanted no excuses.”
How’s that for motivating a team? I rolled my eyes and thought, We’ve come a long way baby, but we still have a lot farther to go. It was about fear of course. Fear of failing. Fear of losing the income to support her family. Fear of what other people might think of her professionally if she were fired. She was free to follow her own path, but she was self destructing along the way. She was battle weary, and I understood that.
Most professional women don’t meet their buds after work for a beer who give them a boost and allow them to blow off steam. Maybe they should. Most women go straight home after work to deal with kids, family, laundry and dinner. If they have friends that are stay-at-homes, they have no clue about the battleground of office politics. A career girl can sometimes feel completely alone. In that way, nothing has changed.
How’s that for motivating a team? I rolled my eyes and thought, We’ve come a long way baby, but we still have a lot farther to go. It was about fear of course. Fear of failing. Fear of losing the income to support her family. Fear of what other people might think of her professionally if she were fired. She was free to follow her own path, but she was self destructing along the way. She was battle weary, and I understood that.
Most professional women don’t meet their buds after work for a beer who give them a boost and allow them to blow off steam. Maybe they should. Most women go straight home after work to deal with kids, family, laundry and dinner. If they have friends that are stay-at-homes, they have no clue about the battleground of office politics. A career girl can sometimes feel completely alone. In that way, nothing has changed.
I think it’s important to occasionally reflect on how far we’ve come, where we are, and what we still need to accomplish. Maybe we need ask, how liberated are we really? Do we really have the freedom to be who we want when we grow up? Will that mean an extra hard road ahead or is it easier now? Maybe the answer is, that depends.
On occasion, like Oprah’s Next Chapter with Gloria Steinem, we need to stop and thank the women who came before us. They were courageous. They took risks—some with great financial set backs. Sometimes we take it for granted that we can hold property and other investments in our own name, vote in local and national elections, hold office or be a certified public accountant and not just a clerk typist, stewardess, librarian or teacher.
I often say that in the 21st century, women are freer than they've ever been in history. We're living the dream of Susan B Anthony and many other women who fought hard for the women of today. Is it perfect? No. Is it better? Yes, and that’s liberating.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
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Other Blog Posts by R. Ann Rousseau: The Only Thing That Matters Book Review, When You're in the Presence of a Master , Surrender to a Happy Outcome, Robin Rousseau Reviews The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer, Is Your Life Mapped Out? Book Review, Robin Rousseau Reviews The Spiritual Human: A Poetic Guide to Life on Earth by Elise Fee, All Things Are Lessons God Would Have Me Learn Oprah's Super Soul Sunday Discussion, Throw Your Unforgiveness into Stinky Creek, Awakening the Luminous Mind - Book Review, Follow Your Dreams - Interview with Photographer Sharon Seaward, The Gift of Criticism - Does it Belong to You?, The Real Rules of Life Book Review, Tales of Everyday Magic - My Greatest Teacher (My Dad) Movie Review, What Did You Do Tomorrow? A Hay House Radio Show Discussion, Yes! Energy Book Review, Are You a Women’s Libber? Oprah’s Next Chapter with Gloria Steinem Discussion, What is Spirituality? - Oprah's Life Class Tour with Deepak Chopra, I Believe - Book Review, Hay House Radio Show Discussion, Living On Purpose - Oprah's Life Class Tour Discussion, My Titanic Family Legend, Pearls of Wisdom Book Review, Enough Already - The Power of Radical Contentment Book Review, Wishes Fulfilled - Oprah's Super Soul Sunday Discussion with Wayne Dyer, A Facebook Message from a Friend in Spirit, Are You Having a Life Crisis? Do You Know What Integrity Is? Wishes Fulfilled - Mastering the Art of Manifesting Book Review, Authentic Power - Oprah's Super Soul Sunday Discussion, KEM - Sophisticated, Sexy, Soulful and Spiritual, Are You Out of Alignment? Choice Point Book Review, The Middle Lane, Clean Your Mirrors, Three Feet From Gold - Book Review, Do You Need a Most Benevolent Outcome?, We Are All Connected Oprah's Super Soul Sunday Discussion, Release the Anger: Oprah's Super Soul Sunday Discussion, One Big Global Blogging Family, Book Review - Psychic Exploration A Challenge for Science, Hay House Radio's New Show SoundWave A Bit Hit!, Do You Believe in Soul Mates, The Future of Astrology, You Always Had the Power- Oprah's Life Class Discussion, Love Doesn't Hurt - Oprah's Life Class Discussion, The Unconditional Love of Animals-Oprah's Life Class Discussion, Your Life is Whispering to You. Pay Attention. Oprah's Life Class Discussion, The Power of a Second Chance: Oprah's Life Class Discussion, Aging : Oprah's Life Class Discussion, Connecting the Dots- Steve Jobs' Stanford Commencement Speech, The Truth Will Set You Free, Discussion of Oprah's Super Soul Sunday Premiere: The World Beyond, A Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom Moment, Eat Dessert First -The Art of Extreme Self Care, Queen of the Law of Least Effort-Seven Spiritual Laws of Success Book Review, Transforming Fate into Destiny Book Review, Awakening the Lightworker Within Book Review, The Physick Book of Deliverance Dane Book Review, Trust Your Gut Book Review, The Spirit Whisperer Book Review, How to Be Inspired Book Review, Infinite Quest Book Review, Biology of Belief Book Review, The Morning Breeze Has Secrets to Tell, The Gentle Way II Book Review, Do You Fear or Respect Mother Nature?, You Can Heal Your Life Movie Review, Impossible Situations are Great Opportunities, Do You Have Enough?, A Wright Brothers Moment! The Sacred Promise Book Review
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